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At one time milk was not homogenized, and eggs were eaten daily in one form or another. Vegetables were cooked beyond recognition covered with butter. Roasts were stewed in their own juices made up of lots of fat.

My mother made a pot roast from fatty brisket of beef seared and then combined with onions, water, and potatoes and slow-cooked until the meat would all but fall apart. It was a dish that was literarily "to die for". These were the kinds of recipes that were delicious to eat but forty years later, killed us. Little did we know then that every time our mothers said "eat, darling," they were contributing nails for our coffins in the form of clogged arteries.

Now we know that if we like chocolate, we'd better like the dark kind. Tea should be green and strong. Two cups of coffee can save our lives. A glass of red wine can make us relax after a stressful day, but it can also help ward off cancer.

Since we all want to live longer and be healthier, it's just common sense to eat what's good for us. But doing right for ourselves isn't all that simple.

The other night when we went out to eat, I had made up my mind before we arrived at the restaurant that I was going to be "good to myself" and order grilled fish. Good intentions aside, I ended up with fried onion rings and steak grilled with a topping of butter.

It was as though those words on the menu had leaped up into my mouth when I was asked what I wanted to order. My brain knew better, but my taste buds won out.

I am always amazed at the strong-willed individuals who can look at a terrific menu and end up with a small salad and iced tea. For those who are weak and want "real food," I want to relieve you of any guilty feelings right now.

Every time you feel like hitting yourself after eating a three-course dinner and then ordering a hot fudge sundae for dessert, remember this: It was all your mother's fault. If, when you were a child, she hadn't insisted on you "cleaning your plate" because there were children starving somewhere in the world, you might never have been tempted, when you became an adult, to keep saving starving children.

I could never get away with this eating trick with my own children or my grandchildren. They were far to savvy and independent even when they were little. My younger grandson can out-stubborn even me when it comes eating something he doesn't like. He was only three when he announced, firmly, "I'm the boss!" And that was that.

Fortunately, I was a very active child, and many times when my mother wasn't watching I skipped lunch for skipping rope in the street with my friends. That kept me from the obesity that today's telly-watching, computer-games-playing, couch-potato children suffer.

My own children were spared those delicious meals my mother made for me. By the time they came around, it was well known that eating the wrong foods can kill us. Since we love our children more than ourselves, it was essential to change to a healthy diet for them.

Before organized ball teams, children actually played spontaneous sports outside their homes with the neighborhood kids. Physical activity keeps children from getting bored. Snacking and boredom go together. That goes for the grownups, too.

But if we really love our kids, we must remember that bad habits start early. We mustn't use food to console a sad child, especially a very young one. Instead of a cookie for a distressed child, give him a kiss. That will make him happy and healthy.