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Nobody ever said that life was going to be easy, and it isn't all the time. If it were, we'd be bored to death before we were ten. But if we learn from our mistakes and misfortunes, we can build ourselves a life that's mostly fun to live.

No one can ever be in a state of happiness all the time. Yet our modern culture says otherwise. If it hurts, we're told, just take a pill. A mother's kiss used to heal our boo-boos, but now a little white pill down our gullets does the trick.

I was thinking about this as I took my early morning walk today. I was in a particularly good mood. I felt strong and energetic. I felt happy. This upbeat feeling doesn't happen every day, but when it does it's wonderful.

We really don't need any pills to make us feel good. Walking in the morning sets off the endorphins in the brain that gives us an attitude of well-being from head to toe. Those lazy birds who deny themselves this natural high don't know what they're missing.

There are people who just won't be happy; they expect others to make them feel good. But happiness doesn't come from without but from within ourselves. Although other people can't make you happy, they sure can make you unhappy. If our spouse or child is miserable there's no way their feelings won't touch us negatively.

Our grandson is just entering the door of darkness, the teen years. The adorable boy who was such a pleasure is now a long, lean, tight-lipped, sometimes sullen young man whose voice is changing. But who can blame him for his misery?

He's got real aches and pains from all the changes that are happening to him, physically and chemically. If I felt the way he does I'd be miserable, too. Fortunately, this state is a temporary one.

But there are those who have no real reason to be unhappy. They're the ones that give others pain, behaving as though they're victims when in truth those who live with them are the victims.

There are many ways to be and stay happy. One of them is change. Somehow when we keep doing the same things all the time we get into a rut. The excitement goes out of our lives and boredom sets in. Happy older people are those who had dreams of what they wanted to do after retirement, and actually go out and do it. They fill their lives with new adventures, whether it's finally reading all the books set aside during their working years, or taking a course in a local college. I have friends who have taken up ballooning, climbing mountains and other activities they had no time for when they were raising their children.

When we finally reach the place where we think we've done all we are meant to do in this lifetime, we should think again. Happiness comes from using all of our brains and bodies, keeping active and fit mentally and physically. If we are clever and keep up with technology, we can continue to connect with the generations coming up behind us.

There's a saying that "If you don't use it, you'll lose it." One of the marvelous gifts of being an involved grandmother is that it keeps us alert and learning new things. Talking with my grandsons about various high-tech photo programs or games and understanding what they're telling me makes me happy.

If we make the most of each day of our lives, we'll find many moments of pure pleasure to relish. Happiness is a state of mind and body, and we're in charge of both.